stay

Today my girls started kindergarten. It has been an emotionally taxing day to say the least. They did well eventually, though the drop-off/departure was pretty rough. They are anxious and scared, sad that life has changed. But we saw them on the playground when they couldn't see us and they were fine. However long the transition takes, we'll be there every step.

There was no hesitation to come to the studio tonight, and I jumped deep into it. The work is coming faster, I have a handle on what this is; even though I am still unsure what makes it significant. It seems that this work brings in a great deal of my vernacular, and somehow turns my phrases and lines into songs. These works are deeply realized canvases, and I am in the studio having this moment of acknowledgement and understanding that I have just entered the Conversation on a whole new level.

What a confluence of highs and lows this day is.

I am going to enter my first outdoor art festival in the next few weeks. Based on the juror, I really don't think I have a chance, but in the end who can say why or when people connect to work? I am experiencing a new sensation of openness to life, and feeling that at any moment I will be given an opportunity to say "yes" to something that will forever alter my life as I know it. Unlike my 5-year-olds, this prospect thrills me; I am not afraid any more.